Shorn

Today was the day, I had all of my hair shaved off this afternoon. (Sorry, no pictures, I just didn't have it in me.) I woke up this morning and after having a gob of hair in the shower and on my hands and on the floor and on the sink and... I decided it was too traumatic to continue to just let it fall out. I told Ron, rather than "death by a thousand cuts" this is death by a thousand hairs!!

There is something rather empowering in being able to make the decision to cut off my hair rather than feeling victimized by the disease making my hair fall out of my head. It is the difference between my choosing something verses something happening to me against my will. I don't know if that makes sense to you or not, but somehow it makes sense to me and was helpful.

At least it was a hot day today, it feels kind of nice and cool with my hair all gone. I haven't decided yet what I will wear mostly on my head...wig? bandanna? scarf? hat? I imagine with my personality, I will just have to decide day by day and possibly hour by hour depending on how I am feeling. At home, I will just go around with my shorn head, so if you come by, just be prepared. I sort of look like I am ready for bootcamp. I have my Mom's premature gray, so a lot of my little stubs are gray, but I actually have more color than I thought I did...yes, I've been dying my hair for a long time. I got my first gray hair when I was 18!!

Last week, I was pretty sad about loosing my hair. This week, with it falling out so much, I am just annoyed. Annoyed is good when it comes to hair because it gave me the impetus to get it cut Now that it is gone, I feel relieved. I think my hair loss is hardest on Hannah, so please be praying for her, I would appreciate it very much.