I have delayed in updating my blog because I find that bad news is hard for me to write. A week and a half ago I went in to see my other surgeon and the wound had separated so far that the skin broke free from the stitches. No wonder it had been hurting!
Wound Care Center:
She and my plastic surgeon talked and decided to send me back to the Wound Care Center. That was an experience. They are so good but really aggressive when it comes to debriding a wound. The doctor goes after the wound with little scissors and a scalpel cutting and scraping away ALL tissue that he thinks is not healthy. Whoa baby. The first time I had to change my bandages at home after that, I had to go lay down. I broke out in a sweat and got light headed just from looking at the wound. For those who know me well, it tells you what it must look like to have that effect on me. I am usually unphased by that type of thing.
Hyperbaric Oxygen (HBO) Treatment:
The wound care doctor called the Hyperbaric Oxygen (HBO) doctor and I went directly from the wound care center to the HBO center at John Muir. They evaluated me and began HBO at 8AM the next morning on a Saturday. They wanted me to be treated twice a day for the first few days, but I told them I would go everyday, but not twice a day. There is a risk for oxygen toxicity if you spend too much time in 100% oxygen at 2 atmospheres of pressure. I didn't feel that the benefit outweighed the risk.
I have had 5 treatments. They think I will need 40-60 treatments. That was a bit overwhelming to hear. I got home and had a good long cry. Ron just sat with me while I cried and ran his fingers through my hair and quietly prayed for me. It was just what I needed. The next day I felt much better and stronger.
Surgery:
I saw my plastic surgeon again yesterday. He said the tissue in the wound looks good for the most part. Thank the Lord there is no infection. There is still some necrotic (dead) tissue that has developed since the last time the wound was debrided (cleaned out). He said that he hopes in two weeks with hyperbaric treatment and wound care that the necrotic tissue will be gone. If that is the case, he wants to take me back into surgery to close the wound. It just continues to get wider and wider, so he has to do something. The least invasive would be to cut away some of the tissue in the center and then bring the skin that is left back together so it will heal. If that does not work, then he will do a skin graft. I am praying the first surgery will work. They hope that since I will have a couple of weeks of hyperbaric treatments already done and will continue to go to treatment for a number of weeks afterward that the surgery will work. I will probably have surgery the week before Easter, if all goes well.
Thank you for your prayers. I had great favor to get into both the wound care and the hyperbaric treatment so quickly. We got to know everyone in both places well last time around. They were all very happy to see us, though sad that I had to be back. I trust the Lord has more for Ron and me to do in those places, we desire to be a blessing and used by the Lord there again.
Thank you for your prayers, especially that I can stay focused on the Lord and His goodness. This delay was not in my plans, so I am having to give my agenda and time schedule to the Lord again. He knows and I trust Him. Thank you!!
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
It will be awhile longer...
I went to see my plastic surgeon today. On the one hand, he is happy with the wound, the tissue looks viable and it is not infected. I am very grateful for that! On the other hand, the wound is so bad and so deep that he thinks the best area may heal in 4-6 weeks. The area that is the worst will likely take 6-8 weeks to heal.
Please join me in continuing to pray for complete healing.
Please pray that the wound would remain infection free!
Please also pray that it would heal much more quickly than they expect. I would like this to be finished and I'd love to move forward.
Please pray too that I do not get discouraged. I am fighting that and winning, but it is a battle at times.
Thank you, I am very grateful for you and thankful that you are continuing to walk with me in this long journey and battle.
Please join me in continuing to pray for complete healing.
Please pray that the wound would remain infection free!
Please also pray that it would heal much more quickly than they expect. I would like this to be finished and I'd love to move forward.
Please pray too that I do not get discouraged. I am fighting that and winning, but it is a battle at times.
Thank you, I am very grateful for you and thankful that you are continuing to walk with me in this long journey and battle.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Yesterday was a hard day
(Warning: this post contains a lot of detail)
I went to see the plastic surgeon yesterday for another post-op appointment. He decided to take the back drain out. It had been in for three weeks, which is longer than normal. It was still draining bloody fluid from my back but had slowed some. He was concerned that the drain itself may have been causing irritation and drainage. As of today, bloody fluid is still seeping from the hole in my back, which is better than having it accumulate under the skin in my back. It is just sort of yucky. I am hoping that by tomorrow it stops seeping. Once it finally stops and the hole heals over I can actually take a shower. That will be a glorious day.
So that was the good news. As I have mentioned previously, I have had problems again with necrotic (dead), non-viable tissue in the newly grafted skin. The nipple had died completely and the necrosis had started spreading to the other tissue in the newly built areola. The doctor said that the radiation damage to the vascular system that feeds the left side of my chest and under my left arm was much worse than he had anticipated. Even though he brought new unradiated skin around front from my back, there was not enough blood flow to support it. So I really need continued prayer for new veins to form and a miraculous healing to my vascular system there so that the tissue that is left will survive and heal.
Yesterday, the doctor went in with a scalpel and cut away and dug out all of the dead tissue to try and give the healthy tissue a better chance to begin to heal. I was awake. It was not painful because I have no feeling in that area, but I could feel pressure and it was uncomfortable. It was hard to loose another nipple, that brings my total to three nipples lost, which is just weird. It is very stressful to loose body parts. I was so hopeful right after the surgery and it all looked so good. I had a good cry off and on during the day yesterday, really just mourning the loss of what I had hoped would make me look more "normal" again. It was also just hard to have all of that cut away. It was pretty deep in places and so he had to sow it all back up. It was just emotionally intense.
I feel better today. I am pretty sore, but emotionally I am doing much better. The Lord's grace has been sweet.
I went to see the plastic surgeon yesterday for another post-op appointment. He decided to take the back drain out. It had been in for three weeks, which is longer than normal. It was still draining bloody fluid from my back but had slowed some. He was concerned that the drain itself may have been causing irritation and drainage. As of today, bloody fluid is still seeping from the hole in my back, which is better than having it accumulate under the skin in my back. It is just sort of yucky. I am hoping that by tomorrow it stops seeping. Once it finally stops and the hole heals over I can actually take a shower. That will be a glorious day.
So that was the good news. As I have mentioned previously, I have had problems again with necrotic (dead), non-viable tissue in the newly grafted skin. The nipple had died completely and the necrosis had started spreading to the other tissue in the newly built areola. The doctor said that the radiation damage to the vascular system that feeds the left side of my chest and under my left arm was much worse than he had anticipated. Even though he brought new unradiated skin around front from my back, there was not enough blood flow to support it. So I really need continued prayer for new veins to form and a miraculous healing to my vascular system there so that the tissue that is left will survive and heal.
Yesterday, the doctor went in with a scalpel and cut away and dug out all of the dead tissue to try and give the healthy tissue a better chance to begin to heal. I was awake. It was not painful because I have no feeling in that area, but I could feel pressure and it was uncomfortable. It was hard to loose another nipple, that brings my total to three nipples lost, which is just weird. It is very stressful to loose body parts. I was so hopeful right after the surgery and it all looked so good. I had a good cry off and on during the day yesterday, really just mourning the loss of what I had hoped would make me look more "normal" again. It was also just hard to have all of that cut away. It was pretty deep in places and so he had to sow it all back up. It was just emotionally intense.
I feel better today. I am pretty sore, but emotionally I am doing much better. The Lord's grace has been sweet.
Still so happy to have my VAP (Port) out!
A few times each day I reach over and feel the area under my right collar bone where my port used to be, I still smile every time. I don't know if all cancer patients feel this way but it is difficult to over state how happy and grateful I am to have that port out. I was very, very thankful to have had it. It was a blessing during my Chemo and Herceptin treatments to have a direct access to a major vein. It was so nice not to have IVs in my arm. It was a much needed life line. But it is so encouraging to be at a place now where I don't need it. Getting that port out was a major milestone for me in my healing journey. It seems like there should be some kind of a port removal party. Maybe once I am feeling strong again, a celebration may be in order.
plucked eyebrows and other indicators of recovery
There are some very pragmatic indicators that help to let you know where you are on the journey back to health. For example, when you are too tired and hurting to even notice that your eyebrows look like a forest, that's when you know you are still pretty bad off. I am happy to say that a week or so ago I noticed the sad state of my eyebrows. A couple of days later I had the strength and endurance to do something about it. A few days later, I passed the next milestone of shaving my legs. I am making progress!
I still have not been able to take a shower. I am hopeful that tomorrow will be the day.
I still have not been able to take a shower. I am hopeful that tomorrow will be the day.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
making progress
Today was a good day with my surgeon. He was able to remove one of my two drains. He took out the one in the front and is hoping to remove the back one on Friday. He removed the bandages from the back completely and the incision is totally healed over. Amazing. It is just a very thin line that runs horizontally where my bra strap or bathing suit would cover it. It is about 41/2 - 5 inches long. It looks great, much better than I imagined.
I will begin changing my own bandages/dressing tomorrow on the front part of the incision. The actual incision is just a round area where he removed much of the radiation damaged skin and using skin from my back, built an areola and nipple. Somehow, through that hole, he was able to remove the damaged muscle and scarring/encapsulation bring the muscle flap from the back up to the front and sow it in place and replace the expander with a saline implant. I saw pictures on the Internet of others who had Latissimus Dorsi flap surgery and they had huge scars on their breasts. Dr. Ghorbani is truly an artist and an outstanding plastic surgeon. You would never know all of that had happened. I almost cried when I realized I had minimal scarring. I am still amazed.
It does look like I will loose the nipple that was reconstructed. It has essentially died. It is black and shrivelled. He will have to remove it, called debriding the wound, later when it is ready to come off. I am not too concerned about loosing it. On the bright side, I probably will never have to wear a bra again. That is a bonus. Please do pray for continued strong and robust circulation for the muscle flap and the areola. Those are really the important parts.
Also, amazing news! I have actually recovered feeling in the reconstructed breast. I could FEEL that his examination gloves were cold. It was amazing!! I haven't felt anything there except some occasional pain since the bi-lateral mastectomy. I am thrilled. It goes a very long way to making me feel "normal."
Finally, I have lost about 50% of my range of motion in my left shoulder. When my back drain comes out I will ask for a referral to go back to the lymphedema clinic in Concord where they do physical therapy especially for breast cancer patients. They have wonderful expertise in this area. Please pray that I regain all of the movement in my left shoulder. Also that I have much grace. It is VERY painful trying to regain movement. Thank you.
I will begin changing my own bandages/dressing tomorrow on the front part of the incision. The actual incision is just a round area where he removed much of the radiation damaged skin and using skin from my back, built an areola and nipple. Somehow, through that hole, he was able to remove the damaged muscle and scarring/encapsulation bring the muscle flap from the back up to the front and sow it in place and replace the expander with a saline implant. I saw pictures on the Internet of others who had Latissimus Dorsi flap surgery and they had huge scars on their breasts. Dr. Ghorbani is truly an artist and an outstanding plastic surgeon. You would never know all of that had happened. I almost cried when I realized I had minimal scarring. I am still amazed.
It does look like I will loose the nipple that was reconstructed. It has essentially died. It is black and shrivelled. He will have to remove it, called debriding the wound, later when it is ready to come off. I am not too concerned about loosing it. On the bright side, I probably will never have to wear a bra again. That is a bonus. Please do pray for continued strong and robust circulation for the muscle flap and the areola. Those are really the important parts.
Also, amazing news! I have actually recovered feeling in the reconstructed breast. I could FEEL that his examination gloves were cold. It was amazing!! I haven't felt anything there except some occasional pain since the bi-lateral mastectomy. I am thrilled. It goes a very long way to making me feel "normal."
Finally, I have lost about 50% of my range of motion in my left shoulder. When my back drain comes out I will ask for a referral to go back to the lymphedema clinic in Concord where they do physical therapy especially for breast cancer patients. They have wonderful expertise in this area. Please pray that I regain all of the movement in my left shoulder. Also that I have much grace. It is VERY painful trying to regain movement. Thank you.
...and I'm back
Well today I feel well enough to sit up and type, that is encouraging. Karyn was not able to update the blog last week as she was sick. Sorry for the gap. I know that after the last post some of you were worried when you didn't hear anything. I apologize.
**Thank you, Karyn, for helping to keep up the blog while I was down. I know you are in a very busy season and I appreciate your help very much.**
Where to begin...
First, I want to thank each of you for praying me through this surgery. I had tremendous peace and grace throughout my pre-op, surgery and recovery. God's presence was tangible and I am grateful.
Karen Greschel flew up and served as our pastor during pre-op which was so sweet. We had much favor. She was able to stay in with us for a good long while. I still had a bit of a cough when I got to pre-op. After she prayed, I didn't cough again until last night. God is so awesome.
Surgery went very well, as Karyn mentioned. Recovery went well too. I honestly don't remember much of it, which is fine with me.
So last Sunday was a bumpy day. I think what happened was the drain in my back got clogged or something and wasn't draining the accumulated blood from my surgery site effectively. The blood has to go somewhere, so it started going into the tissue along my left side between my ribs and my hip. The red and purple bruising kept spreading. Meanwhile, I was getting more and more pale. The skin under my bottom eyelid looked like milk as did my gums. My blood pressure was low and my pulse high. I was dizzy and it sounded like water rushing past my ears. Generally not a good combination. My doctor, who is truly wonderful, wanted to see me on Sunday night at his office. Before leaving, I texted a bunch of friends and intercessors and they began to pray. Karyn updated the blog to alert you to pray as well. In the 20 minutes it took to get to the doctor's office, God had touched me. By the time I got there, my gums and eyes lids were pinking up and my blood pressure had risen closer to normal. The doctor fiddled with the drain and it began to drain again, the bleeding into surrounding tissue stopped. Blood work done the next day showed that I was anemic but did not need a transfusion, which is what we had been concerned about. I have been getting better each day ever since.
Thank you for your prayers! God leans in to hear them and answers (He inclines His ear to hear your prayers).
**Thank you, Karyn, for helping to keep up the blog while I was down. I know you are in a very busy season and I appreciate your help very much.**
Where to begin...
First, I want to thank each of you for praying me through this surgery. I had tremendous peace and grace throughout my pre-op, surgery and recovery. God's presence was tangible and I am grateful.
Karen Greschel flew up and served as our pastor during pre-op which was so sweet. We had much favor. She was able to stay in with us for a good long while. I still had a bit of a cough when I got to pre-op. After she prayed, I didn't cough again until last night. God is so awesome.
Surgery went very well, as Karyn mentioned. Recovery went well too. I honestly don't remember much of it, which is fine with me.
So last Sunday was a bumpy day. I think what happened was the drain in my back got clogged or something and wasn't draining the accumulated blood from my surgery site effectively. The blood has to go somewhere, so it started going into the tissue along my left side between my ribs and my hip. The red and purple bruising kept spreading. Meanwhile, I was getting more and more pale. The skin under my bottom eyelid looked like milk as did my gums. My blood pressure was low and my pulse high. I was dizzy and it sounded like water rushing past my ears. Generally not a good combination. My doctor, who is truly wonderful, wanted to see me on Sunday night at his office. Before leaving, I texted a bunch of friends and intercessors and they began to pray. Karyn updated the blog to alert you to pray as well. In the 20 minutes it took to get to the doctor's office, God had touched me. By the time I got there, my gums and eyes lids were pinking up and my blood pressure had risen closer to normal. The doctor fiddled with the drain and it began to drain again, the bleeding into surrounding tissue stopped. Blood work done the next day showed that I was anemic but did not need a transfusion, which is what we had been concerned about. I have been getting better each day ever since.
Thank you for your prayers! God leans in to hear them and answers (He inclines His ear to hear your prayers).
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